8th Ed. Forum Quotes Worth Quoting

[IronJaw]

Here's a single place to put quotes that are just funny enough to be logged.

Some standards:

Keep it clean please.

Bob's Musings are too funny to be quoted in whole (Not to mention they are mostly pictures).

Link to original page is appreciated.

Context must be given if it pertains to keeping the quote funny/relevant.

If the quote is in a block of text (That's important to the relevance), highlight it in some way.

To start out:

_____________________________________________________________________________



Divided We Fall, a Skink's Quest, Part 1-3 of Five

There was a few more minor arguments, but the team finished stocking up on supplies fairly smoothly. As they were about to leave the city, a Skink priest stopped them. His aides gave them three magical items from the temple vaults. The first was a necklace of warding which Zat-kai bestowed on Tal-Lat who would be taking point. The second item was a pair of lethal obsidian daggers called the Fangs of Sotek. Zat-kai gave these to Veklay, the group’s best warrior. The final item, the Amulet of Chotec’s Wrath, Zat-kai kept for himself because...the idea of magically burning things seemed too awesome to share.

On Tactical uses for 8th edition Lord Kroak:

Fly the skink behind enemy lines, cast mini-lizard-nuke ad infinatum until enemies die leaving one skink that's buzzed out of his mind!

 

[Soteks Prophet]

Yay I'm famous!

 

[Scalenex]

My fiction has a fan, huzzah!

Apart from the prodigious works of Spawning of Bob, I'd say the best place to find humor in the forums is the battle report section. This particular battle report is filled with so many funny jokes, it was hard for me to pick just one joke for the forum. After some deliberation I chose the line I thought was the winner.


Origin: 2400 pts VS Empire

Peek-a-boo! Notice how much the new Bastiladon resembles a Stegadon with a flashlight on top

 

[IronJaw]

Origin: Skroxigor are terrible

http://www.lustria-online.com/viewtopic.php?f=9&t=12758

" ...Unless otherwise stated, close combat attacks can only target Kroxigors within a mixed unit if an enemy model is either in base contact with a Kroxigor or if an enemy model is in contact with Skink who is in turn in base contact with a Kroxigor..."

Only Kroxigors can be attacked ... Spawn-kin rule

I think you might be inserting an immaginary comma into that sentance.
I am fairly sure that this rule is takiking about how to hit a kroxigor, not that you must.

Hallo, my name is Inigo Montoya
You killed my father
Prepare to die!

Love it! Come to think of it, seems like I should create a Scar Vet named Inigo. Seems appropriate.

The "You killed my father" could cause some fluff issues with the whole spawning pool thing. Just saying.

SoB

How about..

"you killed my Carnosaur...prepare to die!"

I thought "a Scar Veteran with a mustache would look weird." I gambled that I could find something by putting "lizard with a mustache" into a search engine. The modern Internet rarely disappoints me.

*Edited chronologically for clarity*

 

[Scalenex]

Terradons

Step 1: Vanguard
Step 2: Drop Rocks
Step 3: ???
Step 4: Profit

 

[spawning of Bob]

Who could forget:

Phatmotha-phucka, I feel your pain. No one takes me seriously either

OH BUT THEY SHALL!!

FOR I!!
ARE IN FACT!!

GW'S HEAD MANAGER OF THE TERRIBLE CONCEPTS DEPARTMENT!
*DRAMATIC CHIPMUNK THEME*

I HAVE DELUDED YOU ALL!!

FOR THERE SHALL BE NO STEGA-DROPPINGS AROUND HERE!

but...INSTEAD!

YOU WILL SEE ....a Stegadon...dropping...A COATL!! *DARTH VADER IS LUKES FARTHER*

AND MORE!

Razordons and Salamanders will be no more!
Now you will only see Eggadons who can only shoot in their behind-arc!
Kroxigors will only be armed with blowpipes!
Saurus will be able to choose sacreds spawnings again, from the follwoing list "Bob................................"
and all fluff will be rewritten so that ALL SLANNS! WILL WEAR! BASEBALL CAPS!!

This from the funniest thread ever to grace Lustria-online. The Couatl, page 5. I would quote the whole thread if I could. http://www.lustria-online.com/threads/couatl.11005/

 

[rychek]

I still think the Stegadon Doom-Pulperizer would have been beyond awesome. Too bad GW doesn't agree.

 

[spawning of Bob]

...... my goal is for all those units to widdle the enemy down...

Once again, Lizardmen pi...tinkle... on the enemy!

From: http://www.lustria-online.com/threads/heavens-more-passive-play.12964/


Edit "Keep it clean please." - spoilsport

 

[Scalenex]

Origin: Slann with Becalming and No Dispel Scroll

Even when I'm not bothering with the scroll I will still take the priest because you opponents are smart enough to use pred fighter to screw with my battle line.

Forced Pursuit. You don't have to overrun.

For that job, I like chief on ripper. Only because while he must chase (frenzy) he can somehow convince everyone else to stay put. I find it funny.
-Matt

I found it funny too. I imagine a Skink Chief saying to 30 Saurus Warriors, "I got this guys!"

 

[Scalenex]

Origin: Ripperdactyl Psychological Warfare

This is my new Blot Toad marker I want my opponent to notice it every time they look at the table and really worry about it...

This is truly too awesome for words...

 

[T_Saurus]

Origin: Ripperdactyl Psychological Warfare


This is truly too awesome for words...

I'm honoured!

 

[spawning of Bob]

This from Zagreekie's "Greek Themed Lizardmen, page 16! http://www.lustria-online.com/threads/greek-themed-lizardmen-dual-carno-gen-and-bsb-update.10481/

I was thinking gameplay wise Ajax fits with a saurus cowboy with Crone of command and a....

Did Ajax have a bossy grandmother?

I'll have to check my Iliad.

SoB

Of corsé he did he is greek! Haha

Ba boom ching!





It's not fair when people have so much talent.

 

[spawning of Bob]

I know that the Danes are easy marks and that English is not everyone's first language, but...

And thanks a lot everyone! I hope we someday meet in some fights, if anyone is coming to Copenhagen I got keys for the local warhammer club (because there are more than just warhammer I got the keys ), so we would be able to play some games, or just talk nerdy

Bay91, I'm sure you meant "talk dirty"

The 'wink' icon makes it all fine....unless your girlfriend finds out. (from Building up an army Aug 9th, 2014)

 

[Scalenex]

Origin: Ripperdactyl Avatar Origins

Just watched Avatar again and couldn't help but notice how similar the ripper models are to the mountain banshee and tetrapteron (the two flying mounts in the movie). The beaks, claws, fan tail, etc. all look like the ripper models. Is it just me or has anyone else noticed this before?

The main difference is that the Avatar models (and Unobtainium for that matter) are significantly cheaper.

 

[spawning of Bob]

Quote from Kroxigor Question

Hey I have received my 2 kroxigors and I know I need to get another one for a unit.
But what would be better to do?
1. Use them as a single unit
2. Use them behind a skunk unit?

Plan B stinks.

 

[Pinktaco]

Not sure about the English word, but skunk is a Danish word for marihuana

 

[rychek]

Skunks are pesky little critters that I would NOT want to be behind. Ever!