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Contest October-November Short Story Contest reading thread

Which story or stories do you like best? (choose up to two)

  • Story One: "The Truth"

    Votes: 3 23.1%

  • Story two: "Call for the Old Ones"

    Votes: 3 23.1%

  • Story three: "The Future"

    Votes: 4 30.8%

  • Story four: "Join the Army"

    Votes: 5 38.5%

  • Story five: "The Sleeping Giant"

    Votes: 3 23.1%

  • Story six: "A Better World"

    Votes: 2 15.4%

  • Story seven: "Light and Darkness"

    Votes: 5 38.5%
  • Total voters
    13
  • Poll closed .
Not a lot of votes though, that's a bit sad.

If I counted correctly then only eight people have voted so far. So basically everyone who has wrote a story and one additional person. (Assuming that each story is from a different author).
 
Imrahil said:
Not quite much, but it is what we usually get (as long as there isn't mentioned a Chaos Dwarf in one of the titles ;) )



This is one of the core rules, I thought.

Grrr, Imrahil
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Yeah I mixed it up with the poetry contest, which allows multiple entries per person.
 
Now, in this period i am forced to use my phone instead of my pc, and to write reviews in this way is a pain.
Nevertheless...

The truth
Very interesting piece, a strong first story to begin the contest with a blast.
I'm not into 9th age and this was a good way to tickle my curiosity.
The piece is well written and it has a clever take on the theme, clashing the different philosophies of 2 different gaming universes.
It's funny how our most beloved reptiles are, basically, fanatical religious extremists. And we love them for that reason.

Call for the Old Ones
The warhammer interpretation of the vanishing planes in the Bermuda Triangle. Nice premise, i like it a lot. Planes that shift thoughout different universes is a classic trope and it works.
The only problem i have with this really nice piece is that is more an introduction and i wanted more.

The future
This really captured my attention. In the first part i totally forgot i was reading about different dimensions, and this speaks good for the author.
The different scenes of corruption and depravity shown to our poor, manipulated skink, are really something that stands out.
Disturbing images. Are they illusions to trick the protagonist? Or real visions of possible futures? Or actual events in alternate realities?

Join the army
After such a heavy story, some light humor was needed, and men, this one has it!
I've counted citations and homages to Matrix, Shrek and Street Fighters.
But leaving aside the funny parts, this is actually a really interesting take on the whole warhammer hobby, which basically becomes itself just another brick in the Great Plan.
Also nice the whole description of how a seraphon senses the world. We should have more of these.
 
The sleeping giant
Ah, the western world is now a pleasant presence in this comp.
Created by Scalenex and furtherly explored and expanded by other authors, in this piece we have a demonic creation of the Chaos Dwarfs as special guest (maybe due to the victory in the last comp? :p).
Anyway, in this story it seems that the Old World is a truly different world (which should be obvious for a alternate setting) but someone knows about chaos dwarfs of that different universe. Storywise the narrative structure is very interesting, and some unwise choices were made by fools, as usual. Nice piece, overall.

A better world
Probably the more bizarre story of the comp. During the carnage of End Times a lone survivor priest tries to escape by using a Slann's device, only to find himself teleported into a lot of different realities (as Scrat in the short "no time for nuts"), continously escaping from horrible situations, until he arrives in an apocalyptic world (after that universe's version of the End Times), where a skaven would like to erase the past and build a better future.
An open end that i'm sure will leave some unsafisfied readers... but hope doesn't need an ending, it just shows the way.

Light and Darkness
A very simple but also a clever and brilliant take on the theme. The strength of the story imo lies in its structure, more than in the story itself. The two opposite universes of Ulgu and Hish, with two very similar, almost identical struggles of seraphon armies agains different opponents, with a 2-parts ritual that ties together, for a single moment, the 2 realities.
Slanns are truly beings of a superior knowledge and power, this is one of the best representation of how their vast intellect bypasses any barrier, to enact the Great Plan.
A great ending for this comp.
 
Killer Angel said:
Wow...
Aside from a story that has been left behind, we have 6 pieces all amassed with a single vote difference between them.
Amazing. :woot:
Click to expand...

Imrahil said:
A lot of votes casted recently :)
Very interesting developement

Grrr, Imrahil
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I think this reflects the fact that a) we've got some promising minds here on the forum and b) that there have been a lot of different and creative takes on the theme.

I like the fact that my theme has created a lot of new ideas :) this is what I was hoping for when I thought of it.

Well done guys!
 
Ultimately, for me, this contest is all about bringing out the best in each of the writers and helping to better their writing skills.

Seeing the results makes me happy as I feel we're getting better.
 
Here are some fairly short reviews.

Story One "The Truth": I am not familiar with 9th Age, or whatever source material the protagonist Lizardwoman came from but her viewpoint and goals was made clear very early and succinctly. It was pretty obvious she wasn't going to sway any minds, but it was well telegraphed to a satisfying conclusion.

Slann are toad-like leaders of the Lizardmen. Slaanesh is the Chaos god of excess. I really dislike "slaan." More importantly, while I understood the POV character, I didn't sympathize with her much and wasn't invested in her struggle.

Story Two, "Call for the Old Ones": It's a clever premise with good imagery but I'm not sure about implementation.

If the Lizardmen are pulling in "their creators" and their creators are in the "real" world, wouldn't they have gotten GW writers rather than military pilots. Also, what are the planes going to do? Are they going to bomb skaven or are they just going to fly around confused like the crew of Star Trek Voyager?


Story Three, "The Future": Great characterization and imagery. A very unorthodox but inspired take on the theme.

My only real misgiving is that the ending is a little too vague. I have no idea what the protagonist is going to do? If he is surrendering to Chaos I want more hints. If he is planning a brilliant counter move against Chaos, I want more hints. If he is giving into despair, I want more hints. If he is planning a defiant end for himself, I want more hints.


Story Four "Join the Army": This is the most unique take on the theme in this contest. Very clever and well orchestrated.

This piece was marred by minor typos. Also, this piece read as an introduction to a grander saga and I am usually lukewarm on introduction short stories. The author rarely finishes his/her grand tale.


Story Five "The Sleeping Giant": I am always pleased to see a Westhammer story and this story serves to provide a tenuous link between Westhammer and Warhammer Fantasy with some archaeology, and it includes Chaos Dwarfs would should earn Nightbringers seal of approval.

This piece had interesting conflict but it didn't feel as Western as some of the Westhammer pieces. Also, Yuqal'Cho-ax and Kai'ax have been in many Westhammer short stories, and they have done many heroic acts, but here it seems they were little more than witnesses to other people doing things. This piece had Lizardmen/Rangos ackwardly tacked on.


Story Six, "A Better World": Seraphon meets the old 1990s show Sliders? Good characterization and excellent scene descriptions. I was not very sure what was going on but I think the confusion was the author's intent.


Story Seven "Light and Darkness": This was a more subtle take on the contest theme. I'm glad there was at least one subtle take on the theme. Good pacing and imagery. The two concurrent plots had good symmetry and I liked the way the Slann tied their efforts together in a very mysterious way.

Hard to find fault with this one, but I'll try. The battle descriptions were exciting but the two POV characters were a little dry, more like narrators than characters.
 
I am very much looking forward to your predictions of who wrote which story ;)

Grrr, Imrahil
 
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