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The Random Thread of Random Randomness

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What an interesting question (sorry I've only just got round to reading this).

Green [Fluent in 10 Languages]
  • you get to choose which languages (in addition to any you can already speak/read/write fluently)
  • fluency extends to speaking, reading and writing
  • your expertise in your 10 new languages would be equal to the level of your current day most proficient language and you would be able to improve upon them as normal
  • the languages are bound to human languages (you can't choose speak with animals)

This is the one I'd be most interested in because as @Scalenex says you can choose to learn 10 dead languages and essentially resurrect them in the modern world. I could finally learn Brythonic properly, and then educate others in learning to speak it so that the legacy of the Ancient British will survive, as well as learning its sister languages such as Gaulish to educate other countries of their Celtic heritage. Alongside my already-existing knowledge of Celtic culture I could rise to become a prominent and respected authority upon them. I could even go so far as to resurrect the more respectable customs and viewpoints from my ancient ancestors, to become a shining beacon of enlightenment in the darkness of this savage, uncultured modern world, that people could look up to for guidance on how to live a perfectly civilised lifestyle. That could help me to make the world a better place without risking being tempted by the far greater power of the Black potion, which I'll talk about below.

Blue [Bangin' Bod]
  • your body is transformed to the level of a "9 or 10" in line with the beauty standards of a culture of your choice (but still bound to the limits of reality... you can't look like the Hulk from the MCU for instance)
  • you gain no other benefit (increased strength, endurance, vitality, lifespan, etc.) beyond your physical appearance (although you can still improve upon these traits in the exact same way as you would without the potion)
  • to ensure that the Red potion is not completely redundant, your appearance is still bound to your age. Meaning, if you gathered 100 people of your age, you would be consistently rated to be in the top 10 among them in terms of physical appearance. So if you're 80 years old, you ain't beating out a good looking 20 year old.
  • your bangin bod includes your facial appearance
  • everyone you knew would still recognize that it is you (for the sake of simplicity), you're just more aesthetically pleasing
  • you retain your bangin bod despite potentially poor lifestyle choices, but you can still accrue negative health benefits
To be honest, while I'm not the most handsome chap in the world, when I do find a young lady perfect for me, I want her to love me for who I am, not just for what I look like. Being less attractive in appearance than in personality makes that easier to achieve without being pursued by women that are, to me, far less desirable.

Black [Mind Reading]
  • you have the ability to choose when and on whom you use your powers on (you have full control over it)
  • you have no ability to control someone's mind directly (although, with practice, the ability to read another's mind could make you very persuasive if you are clever enough to exploit it)
  • reading someone's current thoughts requires the same mental concentration as listening to someone speak and understanding them
  • reading someone's past thoughts requires greater concentration (something along the lines of doing conventional research and shifting through information)
  • as a frame of reference, think of Charles Xavier from the X-men but without the power to control/influence the other person (the information only travels from them to you... you can't implant thoughts/ideas)
This one has the greatest potential as other people have said, but also is the easiest to abuse. A person with colossal ambitions could do a lot with it, but to be honest I have never had very lofty ambitions. One part of me deep down does sometimes wish I could topple the sexist-both-ways, unsustainable, extravert-loving Romanised societies that exist around the world today and replace them with a far more sustainable and civilised one under my own personal supervision, and this potion would make that easier to achieve, but this could become a gamble that fails miserably and pushes me back past Square 1 (I could be imprisoned, or worse). Furthermore, even if I was successful, after I eventually die and if, somehow, my empire was overthrown, some SJW could then rewrite history and portray me as a 21st Century Hitler or something. Not a nice legacy to end up with after spending all that time and effort trying to make the world a better place.

Red [Look 25 until you die]
  • your appearance falls within the upper and lower limits of what you could/did look like at the age of 25
  • you are still bound to conventional weight gain/loss and muscle gain/loss
  • drinking the potion does not alter your life expectancy
  • you gain no further advantage beyond looking young (no increased strength, endurance, vitality, lifespan, etc.), you still physically age as you would if you had not consumed the potion, you just don't look it
This would be a good one if I reached old age, but I haven't even reached 25 yet so I don't know what I'll look like if I take that potion. Also I'm not that worried about looking young - indeed I'd value looking older because I would more easily be able to project the aura of wisdom and intelligence that I aim to be able to radiate. I believe far more in the charisma of wisdom than the charisma of youth!

It has some downsides, but if you could keep the physical attributes of a 25 year old, it would be very well worth it (and would spring into my top 2 choices). Imagine living your entire life in your prime. Imagine being 85 and while your friends are at a nursing home requiring someone to lift them onto the toilet seat, you are out mountain biking or playing football. Yes please.

But you've mentioned above that you still physically age as if you hadn't consumed the potion, you only look 25, and that's it. You'd just be a 25-year old having to live at a nursing home requiring someone to lift you onto the toilet. If anything that would be far more embarrassing than if you looked elderly.

Purple [Able to eat anything without gaining a pound]
  • your fat levels remain at an ideal/healthy level no matter what food you eat and in what quantity
  • you are still able to gain (and lose) muscle as normal
  • you do enjoy the health benefits of living at a healthy weight
  • you are not immune to secondary effects of a really poor diet (clogged arteries, vitamin deficiency, etc.)
  • consuming too few calories will still result in weight loss (and any associated negative effects), but upon increasing calorie intake above expenditure you will gain weight back up to that perfect ideal (but no further)
I actually seem to be rather lucky when it comes to weight control, as even though I haven't actually done that much exercise during this lockdown other than walking around my house and garden and the occasional walk to the postbox to post letters, I haven't grown outwards much or anything like that, so I wouldn't be interested in this potion, at least not at the moment. Perhaps when I'm 50-odd and need a helping hand to keep in shape, it may be useful, but not yet.
 
but to be honest I have never had very lofty ambitions.
...
...
...

I could even go so far as to resurrect the more respectable customs and viewpoints from my ancient ancestors, to become a shining beacon of enlightenment in the darkness of this savage, uncultured modern world, that people could look up to for guidance on how to live a perfectly civilised lifestyle.
...
One part of me deep down does sometimes wish I could topple the sexist-both-ways, unsustainable, extravert-loving Romanised societies that exist around the world today and replace them with a far more sustainable and civilised one under my own personal supervision
...
my empire was overthrown

;)




It has some downsides, but if you could keep the physical attributes of a 25 year old, it would be very well worth it (and would spring into my top 2 choices). Imagine living your entire life in your prime. Imagine being 85 and while your friends are at a nursing home requiring someone to lift them onto the toilet seat, you are out mountain biking or playing football. Yes please.
But you've mentioned above that you still physically age as if you hadn't consumed the potion, you only look 25, and that's it. You'd just be a 25-year old having to live at a nursing home requiring someone to lift you onto the toilet. If anything that would be far more embarrassing than if you looked elderly.

You're correct, for the sake of this game/exercise, the potion would only allow you to look young. My response was strictly in reference to @Killer Angel 's statement:

even if you could keep the endurance and the physical advantages of a 25 yo person, that would still be a trap.
 

Those may be dreams of mine, granted, but I know the gap between those dreams and my actual power enough to know that they would be impossible to fulfill. As a result, my actual ambitions are a lot lower.

You're correct, for the sake of this game/exercise, the potion would only allow you to look young. My response was strictly in reference to @Killer Angel 's statement:

Fair play, I didn't see that.
 

This is the sweetest most romantic thing Disney ever did and the best take on the Donald-Daisy romance ever.

Daisy is almost literally the only one who understands him! She hears the words in his heart, not his mouth.

It's Don Cheadle by the way. Whenever odd story factors make Donald talk normal they give him Don Cheadle's handsome voice.


I really like the sequence that ends with "Seriously, have you been saying things like that that this whole time?"
 
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